Back on your Feet

6:30 am.  Freezing cold.  Coffees in hand.  About to open the door.  Then the phone rings.  "Mom, I'll call you right back."  "Honey, everything is okay."  How that phrase still exists, I'll never understand. It only causes us alarm, immediate worry.  If everything was truly okay, why would someone say that?  "What is it?"  "Erin...she's been hit by a car."  Tears fall.  Throat closes.  Stomach clenches.  Panic.  My sister, my best friend.  But...everything is okay.  It had to be.  It was.  Thank God.

Runners seem to have this idea that they are unstoppable.  I know I do.  Ask one of my best friends, my running buddy, Katie.  I used to dodge cars in Boston like it was my job.  Nothing can be wrong on a crisp morning.  Just you, your sneakers, and maybe a running companion.  Nothing can ruin that.  Or, so I used to think.  Following Erin's accident, I've been more aware.  More aware that there are other things out there.  Cars to watch out for.  Deer to share the path with.  Bikers to dodge.  Enjoy the sound of your breath, enjoy the pounding of your heart, enjoy the crunch of the leaves as your feet make contact.  At the same time, be aware of your surroundings.  Be aware that, unfortunately, you aren't invincible.  

Life could have changed in an instant.  Luckily, it didn't.  I still have my red-headed, stubborn right hand lady.  My sister, my best friend from childhood.  The girl who I sang lullabies to, poor kid.  No wonder she was always crying.  The girl I shared clothes with through high school whether she knew it or not.  The young woman I share all of my secrets and hopes with.  One of my favorite people to share runs with.  My person.  I thank God everyday she's okay.  That we're okay.  

I've always been somewhat stubborn.  I don't think I'm terribly stubborn, but I know I can be sometimes.  I'd like to think this isn't a terrible trait, and that I passed this characteristic onto my sister.  When she told me she had the goal of running by December 1st, I stifled my disbelief.  No way! I thought.  When I saw her in mid-October she could barely walk from one store to the next.  Nick and I had to laugh when she hobbled into Panera for lunch.  Then, one day she calls and tells me she walked for 45 minutes.  Great progress.  Nothing in comparison to the 3 miles she ran two days later.  Incredible.  No one would stop her.  No one would take her off of her feet, or take away from her, our, greatest passion.  Running.  

Erin's accident occurred when she was training for the Philadelphia Marathon.  As our training progressed and times, miles, and mile splits were compared, I was sure she'd cream me when the day came.  While it was unfortunate we didn't have that chance, she blew everyone's minds as well as the half marathon field finishing in an impressive time.  I have no doubt she would have kicked my butt had she run the full.  Who has a terrible accident and can still do a half faster than most people who have trained without interruption for 8+ weeks?  In addition to doing her half, Erin found me at mile 25 and ran into the finish with me.  I'm pretty certain I resembled her hobble into Panera just a month earlier towards the end.  While my grumpiness and fatigue may have come across otherwise, I couldn't have been happier having her run in with me.  As the crowd cheered, "Go, Erin!" towards the finish line, I realized she was the true winner, the true champion.  I can't wait to run a full with her, giving her the chance to beat me.  I'm hopeful my own stubbornness and competitive nature won't allow her to beat me, but we'll see.  We'll see come April as we run Boston, side by side, step by step, stride by stride.

When life knocks you down, you can't stay down.  You've got to get back on your feet.  You've got to prove to yourself that you can do it, if you truly set your mind to it.  No one can tell you no except for yourself.  Never say never.  Stay stubborn.  Get back on your feet, no matter how bad it may seem.  

Meg :)

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Meghan K. Downey
B.S. English Education, Boston University

Northern Guilford High School:

English Teacher

Assistant Cross Country Coach